AFP sent back to Canberra after remarkably uneventful Celebration/Thankfulness/Gratitude Day
CHAC executives breathe sigh of relief as the Grade 12’s final day of classes occurs without major incident
The Wetlands Post can report that the Principal has been sent word it is safe to return, and will come out of hiding in Italy in the coming weeks.
Meanwhile, the senior leadership team is busy congratulating themselves for successfully ensuring the day ran smoothly.
The presence of Heads of House and other staff patrolling outside bathrooms and throughout school corridors is thought to have been highly effective, with the Music Technology department praised for their provision of Walkie-Talkies to facilitate instantaneous and 24/7 communication between the security personnel.
Some teachers were reportedly even disappointed, expressing they had hoped for a bit more excitement.
“They could have at least done something funny, like swap all the unlocked lockers’ locks around,” one young teacher was heard lamenting in the staff room.
Wetlands Post reporters caught wind of a few harmless pranks, which were either ignored or only discovered by allied teachers.
There were rumours of a fashion red carpet/catwalk in one of the girls’ bathrooms, a claim this reporter was unable to independently verify. At least 3 people were consensually and temporarily cling-wrapped, and a mannikin arm was seen placed underneath one student’s car in the car park.
If other “shenanigans” inexplicably managed to escape the sharp ears of the Wetlands Post, please email [email protected] and we will update this article.
Social behaviour experts have warned CHAC executives to not become complacent, referring to the curious phenomenon where every second grade is the dodgy one.
“Last year was a nightmare, half the grade got expelled even before Muck Up day. This year, they were pretty much perfect. Next year, well, look out…”, one such analyst told the Wetlands Post.
The Australian Federal Police (AFP), under the directions of the Principal, has returned to their headquarters in Canberra, where they are likely to stay until next year’s Celebration Day.
The 2023 and 2025 class declined our request for comment.
Probably not much more to come